I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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