i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
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when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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