just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
