i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
