Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
