why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
