So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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