it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
