You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
