that's an acceptable place to lick
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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