do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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