you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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