i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
