wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
