toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
