this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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