I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
