so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
