Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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