she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize