I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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