this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i think i have two assholes
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
