Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
