My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
now i know why i became what i already was.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
