Midget sex pt 2 tonight
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
