Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
