I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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