What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize