The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
