Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
