i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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