so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
