I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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