Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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