girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize