S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
