So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
