Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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