It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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