when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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