She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
