I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
So vagazzling was a success
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
