Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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