I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
