no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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