Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
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Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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