There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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