Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
