question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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