the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
